August and September have been incredibly full months. August began with back to school preparations and took a quick and unexpected turn to the doctor's offices. Blurry vision in my right eye unbelievably became appointment after appointment, MRI's, IV infused steroid treatments and almost unbearable amounts of uncertainty. Throw in back to school preparations and the emotions involved with my eldest beginning middle school and my baby beginning kindergarten and things were a little tense in the Kolb household.
However, God presents these challenges to each of us, most often at moments when we feel least prepared to handle them. We are then faced with the option to make them into opportunities for growth or into excuses for despair. I've never been one to back down from a fight and I wasn't about to now. As stressful as things have been, I can honestly say I am a better person for all that has gone on and I have learned an extraordinary amount over the past 60 or so days that of course, I am more than willing to share and so here are the things that I now know...
- Of all the virtues, patience is my least favorite. Of course, that is because it is not my strength. I'm working on it.
- If you don't want to be treated like a victim, don't act like one.
- I am not in control. I may allow myself to live in the fantasy world that I do have some control but ultimately there is a plan in place for me and I surrender to that plan. It's been created by someone who has far more knowledge and capabilities than I. Who am I to turn down this sort of planning from an expert?
- I'm stronger than I thought.
- God really does provide~if not through my own strengths and abilities, than through the love and grace of others.
- If, as the PTA Treasurer, you announce during a meeting that numbers aren't really your thing, people are going to give you strange looks.
- Good can and does come out of bad. Sometimes you have to look a little harder and be a little more creative but the silver lining is always there.
- If you don't grow together, you grow apart.
- The world does not come to a screeching halt if the items that I so painstakingly put on my to do list do not get completed.
- Lily's soccer teammate, Ella, does not have a sportier kick than Lily~no matter what Ella (the teammate, not the sister) thinks.
- Tomorrow may look significantly different than what I am expecting.
- September and October in South Dakota are far superior months than June and July.
- When someone tells you, "Oh, don't worry it won't be that much work", they are totally lying to you.
- One person's alone is another person's lonely.
- Much to my chagrin, things are not black and white. There are many, many shades of grey. I'm still trying to get my head around the fact that someone can see something that is so very clear to me in a completely different way than I do. Perspective is much more than just an opinion. It is your reality.
- It is impossible to have too much hope. There is no such thing.
- Avoiding a topic often translates into ignoring a person. I prefer the direct approach. Most things are best dealt with head on.
- God provides us all with gifts. It is up to us to identify and embrace them in the best ways possible. Whether your gift is a nurturing spirit, great wealth or free time in which to help others, it is your duty to make the best use of the gifts of which you have been given. Me~I make damn good spaghetti sauce, can plan a Kindergarten party like nobody's business and read books like it's my job.
- Party Pizzas are one of God's aforementioned gifts for us to embrace. I try to unwrap one of these precious gifts at least once a week.
- The little things matter~really matter. Look for the opportunities to make someone's day a little brighter.
- It is bad enough to have to go through an hour long MRI in which you are instructed to not move a muscle to determine whether or not you have a chronic, incurable disease. It's even worse to get an itch on your back about 10 minutes into said MRI.
- God really does not give you more than you can handle. I've always thought of that phrase as a platitude people utter for lack of any encouraging words but it really is true. Even if you personally are not able to handle what you are facing, God gives you the means necessary to get through it. He never fails. Having faith is awesome.
- Knowing is always better than not knowing. Things are rarely as bad as you anticipate they will be.
- The line between what is your business and what isn't is often very blurry. Examine your intentions and exercise your best judgement.
- Productive people=happy people.
- If in December, I am told I have MS, I can totally kick it's ass.
- I am so incredibly lucky that God brought Jason into my life. I recently read something that very much resonated with me. "...you can plan so that nothing goes wrong in life. But it will, and it won't be what you expected to go wrong. So make sure you are with someone who will help you bail the water out of the boat, not someone who will blame you for the hole."~Kristin Billerbeck. I am so very blessed that Jason would not only gladly bail the water but he would do everything within his power to patch the hole. I now know, even more than before, that Jason is an amazing husband and father.
